I want to live
Inspired from Kdrama Series Called Mr. Plankton. what will happen if he never had those bombs?
tick
tock
tick
It is gonna blow in my head finally.
I can't breath i can't breathe. It is suffocating my lungs, pushing my blood arteries to the left and right, making a thread, playing with the inner soul. I begged again and again. “ please i want to live i want to die while looking at the sky, staring at the beautiful look in your eyes and maybe in your arms i want to die while being in your eyes i want to be with you i wanna die with you i don’t know what you will do without me i don’t know if you could survive without me just like i couldn’t survive without you, i want you to marry a guy you were with few months ago, i want you to be with Heaung, i want you to have someone that could love you, give you what u deserves i want you to be who are after 3 years of our breakup but now you are running to me jumping the snows and throwing your clothes off so you could run fast. You keep calling me, my eyes are going blurry and blurry waves of colors, colorful colors plays against your back they keep circling you like you are my death angel coming to take me i wonder if a death angel look like you i would gladly signed up and let you take me i would be yours even after death. “야 죽지 마 내가 직접 널 죽일 거야” she told me she will kill me if i die myself. She is just like herself. I regret taking her from her wedding. I regret taking her from having a new life. I am selfish, wanting her for merely 3 months of my life. It is sick of wanting to die in someone’s hand, someone special, someone who is betrayed and broken too but I want her. I am a jealous man. I want to have her all the time. At the same time I want to abandon her some where far from me. I never told her I loved her all those years we were together. I bought her a ring, celebrated her birthday month to month, comforted her when some scumbags pretended to be her uncle and aunt. I was there for her all that time but I never told her that I love her. She crouch beside me. My eyes are closed but I could feel her cleansing my face, calling my name, begging me not to die. I opened my eyes and smiled from ear to ear. I guess this is what I wanted to see her face, crying half laughing because I woke up again crying. I wanted to see her for the last time and I did. Now I have no regrets. 사랑해요 “ I love you.”
Inspired from Kdrama Series Called Mr. Plankton.
