Temple of reflections
"Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the holy spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own."
I stand Infront of a mirror and have a staring contest with an enemy. Maybe the bitch in the mirror will break eye contact first. I was never one to look away first. I am a winner.
Mirror mirror on the wall,
What are these eyes with out a soul?
Mirror mirror on the wall,
What is this skin?
What is this hair?
What is this flesh?
What a body.
What a temple.
Before me stands a smiling beast possessing a body with an absent God. Remaining ruins of a temple foreign to it's maker. Unknown to oneself. A misfit and forever disfigured by one's own imagination. It feels hollow. It feels empty.
My skin, is getting tighter around my bones. Hand me the scissors. Let me escape it. Time to exercise; a quick cardio, running to the rest room and test my gag reflection against the bath room stall. Look in to the toilet sit and throw up on what you see. What got in must find an exit one way or another. Purge these demons out!
Hair is falling out. Organs are failing. Reality deteriorating. What is real? Was I here? Life is cruel while some are blessed with glamour others must fight to take a glimpse of themselves. To smile at one's own reflection and be okay with what you see. I pick up the mirror from the wall and shatter it. Now we are both broken. Scattered to bits and pieces. Maybe someone will glue us back together. But let's hope they cut themselves and bleed along the way. Misery loves company. It's kind of romantic if you ask me.
Mirror mirror on the floor. open your mouth and swallow me whole. I am under a microscope of my own consciousness. I want to scream but I have no mouth. This body is a temple and I am trapped in it with a bored God who is lonely and merciless. I am trapped and my God has forsaken me. Fuck this body. Fuck being human. I do not belong to me.
Life is cruel and there is a price to pay for being human. Regardless I pray. To be a girl who is self accepting. Picture perfect, a figure divine, a soul beautiful and a human being. A human being sprouting life. A human being that's more than flesh and bones. A human being that survived. A human girl that finally understood that this too shall pass. And all of it did pass.
